#BreakTheNorm – Stay at Home Moms Vs Working Moms

Women’s day is all about celebrating women around the world and raising awareness about their rights in man’s world. This year it was quite a stir about stay at home moms vs working moms after Filmstar Shahid Kapoor’s wife Mira Rajpoot spoke about her being a proud stay at home mom while choosing to judge working moms. This international women’s day on Pakistani Twitter (apart from this Saas bahu type discussion of working Vs homemakers) was all about courageous women who have proved their matel in every walk of life. 

Gosh Pakistan, a Copenhagen based cosmetic company decided to honor such brave women from every walk of life this women’s day and got noticed. It is not easy to be a women in man’s world and definitely an achievement to be at the top of your field. No matter how many times she has to break the norm of being a girl, she is there to achieve whatever she dreams about. Good to see such encouragement and celebration from brands. #BreakTheNorm hashtag made me share my story too which a lot of people got inspired by. It was my honest tale about marriage, work and having kids. I kinda find myself relating to Mira Rajpoot as well as the other mommies around. 

Mira Rajpoot, being completely an outsider to bollywood might not know how to be politically correct like her husband but her choice of words at public forums has sparked outrage often. Being a stay at home mom myself I can relate to her sentiments but then I work (freelance) too. That makes me understand the perspective of both working as well as homemaker women.

I would like to give Mira some linenacy as her intentions might not be derogatory towards working moms but her statement reflects otherwise. Being a star wife and choosing to be a mom at such young age is her choice and she’s happy with her role. I hope in future she realizes that her statements has a mass reach and she should be respectful to other women.

In response to her sentiments there was an open letter written by three working moms explaining their struggles to raise kids as well earn for themselves. The points were extremely valid but was it an effort to demean the stature of stay at home moms? I felt like it was written in a way to portray that working moms are superior to stay at home moms because they have to battle it out more. Then again it is a matter of choice.

Moms are brave, bold and powerful. If they chose to stay at home or work, let them be. Being a women we should support and encourage moms in every possible way. 

I choose to stay at home but I am earning through my freelance work projects too, which allows me to be with the kids most of the time. They’re so young to take care of themselves and I chose to be with them. Whenever I have to go out for any event or any assignment I make sure that the kids stay with their father. It is a constant juggling between the roles but I am trying to manage it. I don’t compare my choices with any other women rather I try to break the norm for myself and excel in doing what I love to do. Between kids and job it is like a demotional experience for mommies. (Shahrukh Khan coined the term demotional which means to be detached and yet emotional about someone). 

Embrace every role in your life with dignity. Be the women who support other women rather than being the one who pull others down. It needs a lot of courage to pursue your dreams, don’t let your gender be a reason not to do so. 

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